children

there are some things i'm starting to be thankful for, every fight we've had, every kiss we've shared, every hug that's been felt. doc and i always use to go 'round and 'round about having children. i absolutely love children, and while doc does as well, he's not ready to have some of his own. for so long i've been so grown up, more mature than i should have to be. doc brings out the child in me, the best in me. this is the time in my life that i want to be selfish....i NEED to be selfish. for so long i've always wanted a child, and having friends around me who are 19 and having children, it scares me. some of barely getting by with what they have while others aren't sure of when they'll be together as a family. i know that if doc and i had a child right now, we would be just fine...but we would never get to experience hawaii as a couple. i would always be nagging him (which i'm sure i'll do anyways) and our parents would never get to see their grandchild. i want my family to enjoy our child just as much as we do, and i want him/her to be as spoiled as possible. but right now, i want to be a child with doc and go to the beach whenever, go snorkling, or go to the clubs. i want to be us again. i miss you babe. come home safe so we can be kids again :)