just a reflection

oh 2010, you've done me good and you've done me bad. 

2010 has brought many laughs, and many tears. i can't thank my family and friends enough because without them, i couldn't have made it through.

in january, i got to ring in the new year with doc, even though he burnt his arm, and it was a complete disaster, i was one lucky girl being able to spend it with him.

in february, doc was in soi, and while i did not get to spend valentines day with him, i got the most beautiful arrangement of flowers from him.

in march, i got to marry my absolute best friend. i got to fly to hawaii for the first time, and spend five wonderful days with him. while i was in hawaii, one of my best friends kyla got to move to texas. 

in april, i was honored to be in one of my best friends wedding. i wish amber and kelly nothing but a life time of happiness. 

in may, i finished my first year of college, and the last couple of days i got to fly out to hawaii. my cousin jared got married, and it was wonderful to see all my family together again. 

in june, i got to spend a week with doc in beautiful hawaii. i also moved out to live with bethany and start an adventure living on my own. i also had to say 'see ya later' to amber as she moved off to cali to be with kelly.

in july, i celebrated my 19th birthday in hawaii with doc. it was such a surprise to be able to spend it with him, and even though 19 isn't a 'big one' i loved being able to spend it with him, even if i was a complete fool, and got roasted in the sun.

in august, doc went off to training for six weeks, and i started my second year of college at highland. i was also offered a full time job at the alumni center, and started august 1st. i got to book doc pre-deployment flight home for october...a countdown to look forward to! my amazing cousin emily got married, and i was very excited that i got to be apart of her special day :)

in september, doc and i celebrated our three year anniversary :)

in october, the countdown to doc coming home was finally over! he was home for two full weeks, and it was the best two weeks ever!  i was one lucky girl, being able to fly out to hawaii again and go to the Marine Corps birthday ball.

in november, i had to say my final 'see ya later' to my best friend. he's currently in afghanistan fighting for our country, and i couldn't be more incredibly proud of him. i got to start working on my very first care package and i got to send it.

in december, i received numerous phone calls and a few letters from doc. i had to celebrate christmas without him, but received the best christmas gift a girl could ask for, a phone call. 

i know 2011 will bring many more laughs and many more tears, some happy and of course some sad. i'm so ready for june to be here and be able to tell myself i've made it. i can't wait to see doc again, and i know it will be one of the happiest days of my life. just like 2010, i know i won't be able to make it through 2011 without the love and support of my family and friends <3

love

have you ever loved someone so much? so much you can't even explain it...to yourself or to them?

i love him, like that deep down, wholeheartedly, unconditionally, forever isn't enough, love him. and there's no way i can ever express to him how much he means to me. he calls me and all i can do is blab about what's been going on, and we hang up and i'm just in this lovey dovey daze for the next 24 hours. i never thought it would be this way. i tried to prepare myself, and maybe i over prepared myself. i started losing hope, and that was my lowest point, and i've promised myself not to get to that point again during this.

on another note, have you ever had a friend, and you lost them, but you don't exactly understand how? little events led up to a bigger event, and it still makes you angry, but you aren't really sure you understand how it got there. people amaze me. you know, i thought that i was more trustworthy, and i thought that i was the confidant. most people confide in me, and i'm okay with that, and i thought that's what happened. and i know a lot of people were hurt, but sometimes, i feel more confused than hurt. the one thing that pisses me off the most is when someone lies to me, and it's not like i was oblivous to the lying, i guess i just had too much trust into that friendship thinking they wouldn't do it again, and they did. sitting here, seven months later, i sit here STILL confused, and hurt. it's hard to believe that we laughed and hung out almost every night for six months, and suddenly one person just messes it up. it's effected not only me, but people around me. i feel like i lost a great friendship, and sometimes i want that friendship back, and othertimes i remember the lies and the backstabbing and it's hard to remember why i put up with it for so long. i wonder what is said about me, because i know what was said about others. at times i don't honestly care because i know i'm better than that, but sometimes, damnit, i just want to stand up for myself so people know i'm not the person i'm made out to be.

who knows what will ever happen.

2 weeks.

it's been two weeks since i've heard from doc, and every time someone asks me how he's doing or if i've heard from him, i hate hate hate saying that it's been a while, and as far as i know, he's okay. i wish i could just tell them all that he's great and i get to talk to him often, but i do know that this is what comes with deployment, so i'm just gonna chug along here, waiting for him.  i finally finished up my classes for the semester, and now i'm just working away, waiting for january to show up so i can start more classes.  i've figured out that i'm super bored without any homework to take up my time.
tomorrow is my grandma's birthday. i think it's so awesome that her birthday is on christmas eve. we're just gonna hang out and eat eat eat! and i can't wait to see my family and just eat. then it's christmasssss! blah, this year has gone way way too fast.  it seems like just yesterday we were ringing in the new year in his basement, with his hand in some cold water. silly boys and their fireworks...one goes off in his hand and burns his whole arm and hand. and i can't even believe we've been married for nine months! hopefully the first part of 2011 goes as fast as 2010 did, and we can conquer this deployment!

even on my weakest days, i get a little bit stronger

even thought it was only one day that i had was such a terrible day, i feel like i've come so far from that day. i know doc loves me, and i know he's always thinking about me, and i'm definitely always thinking about him.  but i'm doing so damn good. i'm already 15% done with this deployment, and damn does it feel soo good. all i wish for is that i could hear from him. i just want to know he's okay and they made it to where they are suppose to be. i'm not expecting that, but it would be so nice to hear that. i know i've been so so spoiled this past month, he called almost every other day, if not every day. i can't wait till june when i can hold him in my arms again and give him so many kisses. it will be here before i know it, but for now, i need to focus on what classes i'm going to take! i want to take fun ones that i will actually be happy to do. after i get my classes figured out, i'm hoping it's smooth sailing from there :):)

worse day :/

Today has been the worse day of this deployment, by far. I found out last night their squad is moving, and no one is sure if they will have a phone or computers. But, I mean, they have to have one, right? The place they are going to has already been set up and such, from what Doc's told me. I just hope it gets better, I mean, I know it will, but I just want to be done with the holidays. The spring always goes really fast for me, and I'm ready for it to be here. I'm ready to see him again, and give him a lot of kisses, and run and jump on him during homecoming. One month down, six more to go.

First Blog

My FIRST blog! Well, I'll introduce myself. I'm Abby Treadwell, I married my high school sweetheart on March 16, 2010 and it was the best day of my life.  I can't wait to start our forever. He is currently employed by the Marine Corps and is deployed to Afghanistan right now. I'm working at the Alumni Center for K-State University in Manhattan.  I'm not a big fan of it, but it's a job and it keeps me occupied.  As well as being a full time worker, I am a full time student at Highland Community College.  I am taking online classes and can not wait for winter break (although I don't exactly get one with my job). Welp, that's enough about me. I'll be blogging soon again!